Susie Orbach Quotes

Powerful Susie Orbach for Daily Growth

About Susie Orbach

Susie Orbach, a renowned British psychotherapist, academic, and social critic, was born on September 14, 1946, in London, England. Growing up in a Jewish family during the post-war era significantly influenced her worldview and later work. She attended Newnham College, Cambridge University, where she studied psychology and psychoanalysis, setting the stage for her future career. Orbach's professional journey began when she worked at the Tavistock Clinic in London. In 1970, she co-founded the Women's Therapy Centre, a groundbreaking organization providing therapy services to women and fostering feminist thinking in psychoanalysis. This pioneering work led her to publish "The Silent Cry: Understanding Self-Harm" (1978), which explores self-harm as a response to emotional distress, particularly among young girls and women. In the 1980s, Orbach's influence expanded with the publication of "Feminine Psychology" (1982) and "Inside baby outside mother: Bion's psychoanalytic psychology for today" (1986). The former work delves into the societal influences shaping women's identities, while the latter explores the intricate bond between infants and their mothers from a psychoanalytical perspective. Throughout her career, Orbach has been committed to bridging the gap between academic theory and practical application. Her book "Fat is a Feminist Issue" (1978/1982), for instance, sheds light on the complex relationship between women, body image, and food consumption. In 1995, Orbach co-founded the University of Essex's Department of Psychosocial Studies, where she served as a professor until her retirement in 2016. Today, Susie Orbach continues to be a significant figure in the fields of psychology, psychoanalysis, and feminism, challenging societal norms and advocating for mental health and well-being.

Interpretations of Popular Quotes

"Happiness cannot satisfy a longing never filled by happiness."

This quote suggests that fleeting moments of happiness, while pleasant, are insufficient to fulfill deep, persistent desires or needs within us. Happiness is often associated with external circumstances, but true fulfillment requires addressing the underlying longings in our lives. These might stem from relationships, personal growth, self-understanding, or contributing to a greater purpose. If we focus solely on seeking happiness as an end goal, we may miss the opportunity for deeper personal development and finding lasting satisfaction.


"We need to understand before we can be understood, to feel before we can make another person feel understood."

This quote highlights the importance of empathy in communication. To truly connect with others, we must first endeavor to understand their feelings, thoughts, and experiences on a deep level – as if mirroring their emotional state ourselves. Only then can we effectively convey that understanding back to them, creating a bond based on mutual empathy. This process allows for more meaningful interactions and fosters an environment where both parties feel truly heard and understood.


"The most therapeutic thing for us may lie in ordinary moments of connection with others."

This quote highlights the profound impact that simple, everyday connections with others can have on our well-being. In a world often overshadowed by stress, loneliness, or disconnection, the author suggests that the simplest acts of human interaction—a smile, a conversation, a listening ear—can serve as powerful therapeutic tools. These moments of connection remind us we're not alone and help foster feelings of empathy, understanding, and belonging, ultimately contributing to our overall mental health and emotional wellness.


"The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it's human connection."

This quote suggests that the root cause of addiction often lies in feelings of isolation, disconnection, or a lack of meaningful relationships with others. Sobriety alone may not address the emotional needs driving the addiction; instead, true healing can come from forming genuine human connections where one feels seen, understood, and valued.


"We need to remember that an individual's sense of self-esteem is dependent on the regard in which they are held by others."

This quote by Susie Orbach emphasizes the interconnectedness between personal identity and social validation. It suggests that our feelings of self-worth, or self-esteem, are significantly influenced by how others perceive and treat us. In other words, we often derive a sense of self-value from the respect and appreciation we receive from our surroundings, whether it be family, friends, society, or community at large. This quote underscores the importance of fostering healthy and supportive relationships to nurture positive self-esteem and promote overall well-being.


In my mum's day, you needed to be beautiful for a very short time to catch your man. It didn't start at six and go on until you're 75, right?

- Susie Orbach

Six, Very, Mum, Short Time

Consumer society tantalises us. We then try within ourselves to control the needs that are being constantly stimulated.

- Susie Orbach

Control, Needs, Within, Stimulated

I'd like to see much more understanding of emotional issues around hurt, abandonment, disappointment, longing, failure and shame, where they stem from and how they drive people and policies brought into public discourse.

- Susie Orbach

Shame, Policies, Brought, Abandonment

Fat people are so rarely included in visual culture that fat is perceived as a blot on the landscape of sleek and slim.

- Susie Orbach

People, Slim, Perceived, Blot

Bodies are becoming our personal mission to tame, extend and perfect.

- Susie Orbach

Mission, Becoming, Tame, Extend

If you continually diet, you are putting your body in a quasi-famine situation. It slows your metabolism down and breaks the thermostat. Diets don't work. They don't help you understand why you're eating more than your body wanted in the first place.

- Susie Orbach

Why, Your, Putting, Diets

Fat is a way of saying no to powerlessness and self-denial.

- Susie Orbach

Saying, Fat, Powerlessness, Self-Denial

I think it is one of the capacities of human beings, to create style.

- Susie Orbach

Think, Human Beings, I Think, Capacities

No one likes to feel helpless. We find it psychologically unbearable and inside ourselves we may try to make ourselves part author of our misfortune rather than simply the recipient of it.

- Susie Orbach

May, Rather, Author, Helpless

Boys, young men, men of all ages are being captivated by the new visual grammar which pushes men to pout and posture.

- Susie Orbach

New, Young, Which, Young Men

I'm the sort of person who likes to undo everything.

- Susie Orbach

Person, Everything, Sort, Undo

The analyst's psyche operates as a kind of... something to hold on to while somebody's going through therapy, if they're deconstructing their own psyche, if that's cracking up in some way, or dissolving.

- Susie Orbach

Through, Some, Psyche, Cracking

The insistence that the commercialisation of the body is a fit subject for political discussion and intervention is well overdue.

- Susie Orbach

Political, Fit, Subject, Overdue

Today, 'fat' has become not a description of size but a moral category tainted with criticism and contempt.

- Susie Orbach

Size, Contempt, Tainted, Category

When I was growing up, one or two girls were beautiful, but it was not an aspiration, right?

- Susie Orbach

Right, Two, One Or Two, Aspiration

I'm a therapist and that fascinates people because they think I carry secrets.

- Susie Orbach

Think, Carry, Because, Fascinates

Not that it was Twiggy's fault, but the ubiquity of her image created a sense in young women that to be stylish meant to be skinny, flat-chested with an ingenue face and straight hair.

- Susie Orbach

Image, Young Women, Meant, Meant To Be

I wish we could treat our bodies as the place we live from, rather than regard it as a place to be worked on, as though it were a disagreeable old kitchen in need of renovation and update.

- Susie Orbach

Treat, I Wish, Though, Kitchen

Public intellectuals come from a range of areas and use their expertise to comment more widely than just their field. They want to make a contribution to public space, and they stick their necks out to do it.

- Susie Orbach

More, Use, Widely, Comment

A wanted pregnancy as much as a dreaded pregnancy can play differently than all one's previous imaginings.

- Susie Orbach

Play, Differently, Wanted, Dreaded

There are so many young women who tip over into being a facsimile: they don't really inhabit their lives or their bodies.

- Susie Orbach

Over, Young Women, Lives, Tip

In general, the Western body has become a global brand.

- Susie Orbach

General, Global, Western, Brand

Beauty has been democratised. No longer the preserve of movie stars and models but available to all. But while the invitation to beauty is welcomed, it has become not so much an option as an imperative.

- Susie Orbach

Beauty, Been, Models, Imperative

Our idea of a healthy body is so destabilised that insecure people have come to bolster their own bodies by deeming others - those with fat bodies - less worthy, less capable and less employable.

- Susie Orbach

Own, Idea, Bodies, Bolster

I've always felt very sympathetic from the first days of writing about women that, whatever the woman, whether she is trying to be a woman in the conventional sense or breaking the boundaries, those struggles are quite difficult.

- Susie Orbach

Woman, Very, Sympathetic, Struggles

No one leaves a long-term relationship scot-free or without conflict.

- Susie Orbach

Relationship, Leaves, Conflict

Mothers unconsciously allow more latitude to sons, and open encouragement, and with daughters they treat them as they would treat themselves.

- Susie Orbach

Treat, More, Allow, Encouragement

If I were afraid of wrinkles, I'd probably be hiding in a cupboard, because I have a lot of them.

- Susie Orbach

Wrinkles, Hiding, Lot, Cupboard

Dare to be as physically robust and varied as you always were.

- Susie Orbach

Always, Physically, Robust, Dare

The parents' job is to be there for their kids, not the other way round. Troubles between parents need to be talked through with friends and not visited on the children.

- Susie Orbach

Through, Need, Other, Visited

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