Simon Rich Quotes

I try not to write jokes that are mean. I try my best to write jokes that are pretty universal and jokes that don't attack anyone. I know I often fall short of that and end up taking unfair swipes at people, but I try not to.

- Simon Rich

I read the Bible when I was 12 while studying for my bar mitzvah. I was also reading a lot of Dilbert comics at the time, and I guess the two kind of got fused in my mind. I've always imagined God as an irrational, distractible boss. It's my best explanation for our planet.

- Simon Rich

At the end of the day I'm writing comedy. If you get too realistic as a comedy writer with your disasters, it stops being funny.

- Simon Rich

Most of my work is, I get an idea, and, with the help of Wikipedia, I can write. I don't have to leave my apartment.

- Simon Rich

I never felt ostracized or made to feel strange by obsessing over 'The Onion' or 'Calvin and Hobbes.' That was considered completely normal.

- Simon Rich