Matthew Perry Quotes

I used to be a real prince charming if I went on a date with a girl. But then I'd get to where I was likely to have a stroke from the stress of keeping up my act. I've since learned the key to a good date is to pay attention on her.

- Matthew Perry

Dating, Date, Used, Prince Charming

I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.

- Matthew Perry

Going, John Wayne, Persona, Old School

Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

- Matthew Perry

Game, Bad, I Think, AI

Trying to overcome addiction is one of the hardest things for a person to do. And the fact that I had to do it under the scrutiny of tabloid press at first made it seem even more difficult. But in fact, it oddly ended up being a plus. Because of the tabloid stuff, it wasn't like I could walk into a bar and order a drink.

- Matthew Perry

Overcome, Fact, Tabloid, Oddly

The key to sitcom success is miserable people. If you see a happy couple, it's just gone, like when Sam and Diane got together on Cheers.

- Matthew Perry

Success Is, Couple, Diane, Key

I've been on a show before where I was on a billboard and then, after like three or four weeks, they took the billboard down and replaced it with nothing. Took my face down and put a white board up.

- Matthew Perry

Been, Took, Weeks, Billboard

When I die, I'd like' Friends' to be listed behind 'helping people.'

- Matthew Perry

Die, Behind, Listed, Helping People

I grew up babysitting and always enjoyed it. I love family. A couple of my closest friends have kids, and I'm their godfather, and that's one of my greatest pleasures in life, just picking them up from school and hanging out with them.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Babysitting, Couple, Godfather

I went to a high school that didn't have many people in it. There were, like, 60 people in my senior class. There was a group of cool kids and a group of really dorky kids, and I was probably the coolest of the really dorky kids.

- Matthew Perry

Cool, Like, Dorky, Coolest

I would always be the kid that got in trouble in school, that's for sure, for joking around.

- Matthew Perry

Always, Sure, Would, Joking

I got sober because I was worried I was going to die next year.

- Matthew Perry

Die, Next, Going, Sober

My favorite actor was, is, Michael Keaton. Certainly growing up, in the movie 'Night Shift' he did something brand new that I hadn't seen before that we all steal from now. And then it was in 1987 he did the movie 'Clean and Sober' and 'Beetlejuice' in the same year, and that was when I said, 'Wow, that's what I want to do.'

- Matthew Perry

Movie, Before, Steal, Sober

I'm very similar to Chandler in many ways, although Chandler is funnier than me, and Chandler absolutely hates his job whereas I absolutely love my job.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Very, Similar, Whereas

I would like you all to give me a round of applause as I have not crashed my car in over 15 months.

- Matthew Perry

Give, Over, Months, Crashed

In a perfect world, my tennis game gets better. I have kids and a beautiful wife and live on some hill somewhere that's not in Los Angeles. And the script that Tom Hanks just barely turned down gets in my hands.

- Matthew Perry

Game, Hands, Some, Perfect World

I think if you look back at all those great comedies on television in the past, it's all lovable losers that gathered together - 'Taxi' and 'Cheers,' 'Seinfeld' and 'Friends.'

- Matthew Perry

Think, In The Past, I Think, Lovable

'The Whole Nine Yards' I liked right away. It was kind of a dark comedy at first. And just the idea of being in a movie with Bruce Willis was pretty exciting.

- Matthew Perry

Pretty, Away, Nine, Right Away

I was a guy who wanted to become famous. There was steam coming out of my ears, I wanted to be famous so badly. You want the attention, you want the bucks, and you want the best seat in the restaurant. I didn't think what the repercussions would be.

- Matthew Perry

Think, Famous, Badly, Steam

I certainly wear my heart on my sleeve, and I think that comes out in the characters that I play. There's a yearning, or something, that comes out of me that people relate to.

- Matthew Perry

Play, Think, Certainly, Sleeve

There are two ways to go when you hit that crossroads in your life: There is the bad way, when you sort of give up, and then there is the really hard way, when you fight back. I went the hard way and came out of it okay. Now, I'm sitting here and doing great.

- Matthew Perry

Doing, Bad, Here, Sitting

I've certainly had a lot of experiences in my life where I was much too self-centered.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, Had, Certainly, Self-Centered

If I could walk into the 'Friends' audition again and go or not go, I have to say it's 50-50.

- Matthew Perry

Audition, Again, Could, 50-50

Nine times out of 10, women don't want to fix a problem, they just want to be understood. I'll never get that.

- Matthew Perry

Want, Out, Nine, Understood

I was a very good tennis player in Ottawa, Canada - nationally ranked when I was, like, 13. Then I moved to Los Angeles when I was 15, and everyone in L.A. just killed me. I was pretty great in Canada. Not so much in Los Angeles.

- Matthew Perry

Good, Very, Moved, Ranked

I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me.

- Matthew Perry

Woman, Sense Of Humor, Need, Jokes

I learned to fall down early in life - I was, like, six - because I realized it was a way to make girls laugh.

- Matthew Perry

Like, Six, Learned, Laugh

My favorite six words in recovery are: trust God, clean house, and help others.

- Matthew Perry

Trust, Words, Six, Help Others

The goal is to have to do the shot again because the camera guy shook a little bit as he was laughing. Without that happening, I'm not happy because there's nothing better for me than a world that everybody's just trying to make each other laugh.

- Matthew Perry

Happy, Other, Everybody, Laughing

I think we need to educate our doctors about addiction.

- Matthew Perry

Think, Need, I Think, Educate

I learned a valuable lesson doing 'Mr. Sunshine,' which is that I didn't want to be in charge because it's too much. Being in charge and acting in every scene was just too difficult. It's like eating dinner in a moving golf cart every night.

- Matthew Perry

Sunshine, Doing, Cart, Every Night

There was a time when I wasn't working a lot. It ebbs and flows. Mostly I was just living my life and playing 'Fallout 3,' a very fun game.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, Very, Mostly, Fallout

I never really thought of myself as a physical comedian. But when I was a kid, I used to, you know, pretend to trip over things to make girls laugh in school and stuff like that. So I kind of learned how to fall without hurting yourself.

- Matthew Perry

Thought, Kid, Used, Hurting

When I was younger, I used humour as a tool to avoid getting too serious with people - if there was deep emotional stuff going on, then I would crack a joke to defuse the situation.

- Matthew Perry

Deep, Younger, Going, Tool

My sense of style is an old Polo shirt, jeans and, unfortunately for the longest time, white running shoes, which was not attractive. The one thing I've learned about clothes is to ask a girl.

- Matthew Perry

Jeans, Longest, About, Polo

To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps.

- Matthew Perry

Behind, Some, Comedian, Helps

I've just found out there are pages on the internet dedicated to whether I'm gay or not.

- Matthew Perry

Found, Pages, Dedicated, Gay

Well, I was lucky enough to be involved in about 19 failures at an early age, so I'm realistic about the success I'm having and how quickly it can go away. What's important is to be smart about it.

- Matthew Perry

Lucky, Failures, Having, Early Age

They say that women like a man who can make them laugh, and I find that if you can make a woman laugh on the first and second dates, then you're doing well.

- Matthew Perry

Woman, Doing, Like, Dates

I'd say that on 'Friends' my character was the guy bouncing around the room. I'm no longer that guy, necessarily, in my life. I used to be. But I'm not now.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, Say, Guy, Bouncing

I became a big Kings fan, and then later on my hometown of Ottawa got a team, so then I was very, very torn. I just love both of those teams very much.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Big, Became, Ottawa

I have what I like to call a 'chinneck.' My chin just flows rather easily into my neck.

- Matthew Perry

Call, Like, Flows, Chin

Vicodin, I got addicted to that little pill. The reason I don't talk about it too much in the press is because it isn't funny, and I love to be funny in interviews. If you joke about that period in your life, it doesn't seem right.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Reason, About, Press

I always have the same thing - which is the fear of not getting a laugh - that I've had from the time I was a kid; obsessing over, 'This joke doesn't quite work, we've got to get this right.' I was always like that, whether I was a member of a six-person ensemble or whether I'm the center of a show.

- Matthew Perry

Kid, Show, Same Thing, Joke

Women always think that I'm Chandler, so if I don't joke around for half an hour, they think that something's wrong. Then I explain that I don't have comedy writers scripting everything I'm saying at this particular dinner.

- Matthew Perry

Explain, Around, Half, Joke

In high school, my prom date fooled around with another guy - on prom night!

- Matthew Perry

Date, High, Prom, Fooled

I don't need to be reminded that I was on 'Friends.' I remember - some of it, anyway.

- Matthew Perry

Remember, I Remember, Some, Reminded

There are two sides to being pigeonholed. There's, 'Oh, no, I'm going to be Chandler for the rest of my life,' but there's also the fact that getting to play Chandler opened up doors to me. It's now my job to find things that shake it up a little bit.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, Play, Fact, Sides

I can tell if someone is talking to me because I'm on 'Friends' or cause they just think I'm neat. You know I don't think I've ever spent more than five or ten minutes with somebody who was ogling me because they recognized me from the show.

- Matthew Perry

Tell, Show, Cause, Neat

I know Chandler is similar to me. But if you watched my life for a week, there would be many more boring parts.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, Week, Similar, Parts

When I was, like, 15, I realized there could be a career in making people laugh - like, you could get paid to do it. That was insane to me.

- Matthew Perry

Career, Making, Like, Paid

To me, writing is remembering something funny that happened, or maybe something I said seven years ago.

- Matthew Perry

Remembering, Seven, Maybe, Years Ago

I've been accused of not really paying attention to a sentence unless my name comes up in it twice.

- Matthew Perry

Sentence, Been, Accused, Paying

After I got my first laugh on stage, I was hooked.

- Matthew Perry

Stage, Got, After, Hooked

The thing that I'm most proud of in my life is that if a stranger came up to me and said, 'I can't stop drinking. I can't stop drinking. Can you help me?' I can say, 'Yes, I can help you.'

- Matthew Perry

Proud, My Life, Drinking, Stranger

I love the idea of 'the one' but I actually believe that there isn't a Miss Right. There are 12,000 Miss Rights out there and it's all timing.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Timing, Idea, Miss

I loved playing Chandler. I grew up playing that part.

- Matthew Perry

Loved, Part, Playing, Loved Playing

My feeling on therapy is it's a luxury, and if you're fortunate enough to get some smart people to talk to about life, then that's fortunate and you should go for it.

- Matthew Perry

Go For It, Some, Therapy, Luxury

Chandler's the guy everybody thinks will do well with women, but he thinks too much and says the wrong thing.

- Matthew Perry

Will, Guy, Everybody, Thinks

I would love to have kids one day. In fact, I'm pretty good with them. I grew up with five half-siblings, the youngest of whom is 11 years younger than me, so I think I learned some pretty cool parenting skills quite early on in life.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Some, I Think, Pretty Good

It's not foreign for me to be talking about my problems in circles.

- Matthew Perry

Me, Circles, About, Foreign

I have a well-documented history of trouble with intimacy.

- Matthew Perry

History, Intimacy, Trouble

I gravitate towards sort of broken characters who try to be better people.

- Matthew Perry

Broken, Better, Characters, Gravitate

I don't have a very 'masculine' taste in music. I get a lot of heat from my friends about that.

- Matthew Perry

Heat, Taste, Very, Masculine

I certainly like the rumour that I was the father of Elizabeth Hurley's baby. It made me think I could impregnate women in a different way to everyone else. Elizabeth and I were never alone in a room together, so I must be a very powerful man indeed. Actually, I'm thinking of suing the baby!

- Matthew Perry

Father, Very, Suing, Rumour

I am fine with the fact that some of my hair is gray. If it was all gray overnight, that would be a scary thing.

- Matthew Perry

Fact, Some, Am, Gray

'Friends' was a magical thing, and no one's going to ever have anything like that again.

- Matthew Perry

Like, Going, Ever, Magical

A lot of people think that addiction is a choice. A lot of people think it's a matter of will. That has not been my experience. I don't find it to have anything to do with strength.

- Matthew Perry

Strength, Think, Been, Addiction

It's tough to have a movie-star persona when you're on a show as successful as 'Friends.'

- Matthew Perry

Tough, You, Show, Persona

If there's a silence in a room I'll try to fill it as soon as humanly possible.

- Matthew Perry

Silence, Try, Possible, Room

I'm a sensitive guy. If you are a woman and you're in any kind of emotional duress and you write a song about it, I'll buy you album.

- Matthew Perry

Woman, Song, Kind, Sensitive

I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Law, Hockey, Canada

That's like the greatest experiences of my life still, 'Friends,' so it's not something I want to get away from, but I do want to try and show something new.

- Matthew Perry

My Life, New, Still, Experiences

As for my personal life, I'd love to start a family of my own. I think I'd make a great dad, and I think shortly I would make a great husband.

- Matthew Perry

Love, Think, I Think, Husband

As an actor, being on autopilot is the worst thing possible.

- Matthew Perry

Actor, Worst, Being, Worst Thing

The thing is, if I don't have sobriety, I don't have anything.

- Matthew Perry

Anything, Thing, Sobriety

If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.

- Matthew Perry

Had, Being, Whole, Famous

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