"I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."
This quote by Joan Rivers humorously conveys her preference for a lifestyle that does not prioritize physical activity like exercises or bending over (as one might do during chores). Instead, she expresses a desire to maintain an elegant and luxurious image, as suggested by the reference to diamonds on the floor, which could be associated with royalty and wealth. In essence, Joan Rivers playfully suggests that if God had intended for her to assume such positions, He would have made it more attractive (like finding diamonds) rather than through mundane activities.
"I'm a woman in show business, I can't just sit around and wait for things to happen to me."
This quote by Joan Rivers underscores the proactive attitude necessary for success, particularly for women in entertainment. It suggests that mere passivity or waiting for opportunities to come is insufficient; instead, one must take initiative, seize chances, and drive their own destiny, just as she did in her illustrious career.
"I hate housework! You make a sweat mopping but you make an adventure rolling your suitcases."
Joan Rivers expresses her dislike for routine, monotonous tasks like housework (sweat-making work) in comparison to the excitement and novelty of travel (adventure-making when rolling suitcases). This quote conveys that she finds a sense of adventure or enjoyment in experiences outside of daily chores, but not necessarily within them.
"The only time I ever see positive is in my bank account."
Joan Rivers' quote, "The only time I ever see positive is in my bank account," suggests that she views the concept of 'positive' as something tangible and measurable, such as money or financial gain. In essence, this quote highlights her pragmatic approach to life where success and positivity are defined by material prosperity. However, it also indicates a potential cynicism towards intangible concepts of positivity like happiness, fulfillment, or personal growth that cannot be directly quantified or measured in monetary terms.
"Men are like wine... Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age."
This quote suggests that just as some wines may sour or turn into vinegar over time, men can also lose their charm or become less appealing. However, the "best" men, like fine wine, improve with age, implying they grow wiser, kinder, and more attractive as they mature. In essence, it's a playful yet insightful commentary on the maturation process of both men and wine, emphasizing that quality improves over time in those who invest in their growth and development.
Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries have gone. I hate children on planes. I'm very shallow, so they tend to be little things. To be honest, I think I was probably angry the day I was born, you know, about diapers or something.
- Joan Rivers
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