Jo Brand Quotes

Powerful Jo Brand for Daily Growth

About Jo Brand

Jo Brand (Joanna Victoria Brand, born January 17, 1957) is a renowned British comedian, television presenter, actress, and author known for her sharp wit, biting satire, and unapologetic humor. Raised in Wallington, Surrey, Brand developed an early interest in comedy, citing her family's love of music hall as a significant influence. She studied French at the University of Sussex but left without graduating to pursue a career in stand-up comedy. Brand began performing on the alternative comedy circuit in the 1980s, eventually appearing in numerous shows like "The Comedy Cafe" and "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" She gained widespread recognition for her appearances on "Live at the Apollo," and as a panelist on "Have I Got News for You." Brand's debut stand-up show, "A Show Called Jo," won the Perrier Award at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 1987. Throughout her career, Brand has tackled various social issues with humor and intelligence, earning a reputation as one of Britain's most incisive satirists. Her books include "The More You Ignore Me, The More I Talk: Encounters in a Difficult Family" (1996), a memoir about her family dynamics, and "Damned Juh-Lay: My Battles with Depression" (2017), which explores her struggles with mental health. In addition to her work in comedy and television, Brand has also ventured into radio, hosting BBC Radio 4's "The Big Questions." She is an outspoken advocate for feminism, LGBTQ+ rights, and mental health awareness, using her platform to address social justice issues with humor and empathy. Throughout her distinguished career, Jo Brand has made a lasting impact on British comedy and continues to challenge societal norms through her unique brand of satire.

Interpretations of Popular Quotes

"I'm not a feminist, I just hate men."

This quote by Jo Brand is often misinterpreted due to its colloquial nature. She does not suggest an inherent hatred towards all men but rather emphasizes her strong feminist beliefs, which can sometimes manifest as frustration with societal gender inequalities that disproportionately affect women. It's important to remember that feminism is about advocating for equal rights and opportunities between genders, and it doesn't equate to hating men. Instead, it's a call for understanding, empathy, and action towards achieving true gender equality.


"It's a bit like being raped, but less enjoyable." (on jury service)

This quote by Jo Brand is a hyperbolic metaphor highlighting her frustration and discomfort with the jury service process. By comparing it to an unwanted and traumatic experience such as rape, she emphasizes that although not literally identical, both situations impose an involuntary intrusion into one's personal life, disrupt daily routines, and can be experienced as a significant inconvenience or burden.


"There are two types of people in this world: those who can extricate themselves from a compact car with a pair of tail scissors and those who can't."

The quote by Jo Brand suggests that there are two distinct groups of people based on their ability to perform an unusual, specific task – namely, escaping from a compact car using tail scissors. It seems to imply that this skill separates the 'exceptional' or 'resourceful' individuals from those who might be considered less so. However, it also hints at a sense of humor and whimsy, as such a scenario is highly unlikely in everyday life. Overall, it serves as an amusing way to highlight differences between people, emphasizing adaptability and resilience.


"I'm all for a woman's right to choose, as long as she chooses what I want her to choose."

This quote by Jo Brand is a satirical commentary on the patriarchal nature of certain societal norms. The phrase "woman's right to choose" traditionally refers to reproductive rights, but in this context, it is used ironically. By saying she supports a woman's right to choose "as long as she chooses what I want her to choose," Brand highlights the hypocrisy and control that can exist in such statements, suggesting that true feminism should be about empowering women to make their own choices without external influence or coercion.


"There are only 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary code and those who don't." (A classic computer science joke)

This humorous quote is a classic example of a computer science joke that plays with binary numbers, which are the base-2 numeral system used to represent numerical values in digital computers. The jest suggests that there are only two types of people: those who understand binary code (people "in the know") and those who do not (everyone else). This is because in binary, there are only two digits (0 and 1), reflecting a simple division between individuals with knowledge of the system and those without.


I can honestly say I've never sold any arms to a repressive foreign regime while reassuring everyone at home that the weapons will be used for nice things.

- Jo Brand

Sold, Honestly, Regime, Reassuring

I used to get nervous about three weeks before a gig... now I've managed to condense it down to a manageable ten minutes.

- Jo Brand

Minutes, Before, Weeks, Gig

I find it difficult to judge myself, but people say that I have become a bit more socially acceptable over the years in terms of my material; which apparently at the beginning - though I never really intended it to be - was man hating and now is just a bit more cuddly.

- Jo Brand

Beginning, Acceptable, Bit, Hating

Regular panelists on shows can be terrifying. They own that space, and many guest comics suspect they are favoured in the edit, while their own hilarious jokes end up being ejected into the ether.

- Jo Brand

Terrifying, Ether, Edit, Hilarious

The thing I thought about doing it was it's Comic Relief and you've got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can't sing.

- Jo Brand

Thought, Doing, About, Hilarious

My mum is bright, ambitious, well read, political and very bolshie: when my dad was conscripted into the Army and posted to Libya, she convinced some general to let her go with him. I don't know how she managed it.

- Jo Brand

Some, Very, Mum, Posted

When I got married, the Sun ran the headline: 'Here comes the bride, all fat and wide.' Luckily, it was a few days after the wedding - but it was still hideous to read at a great romantic moment.

- Jo Brand

Bride, Here, Still, Luckily

My preference is swimming in the sea. I find the sea is more liberating, wild and good fun rather than plodding up and down a pool.

- Jo Brand

More, Rather, Preference, Liberating

I like reading, I like boring things, and yet I think people for ages had this image of me that I was on the tube with a chainsaw looking for any likely candidate.

- Jo Brand

Think, Image, Likely, Chainsaw

My mum and my husband are from Irish backgrounds, so we have a lot of potatoes. Chips, mashed, boiled, new potatoes, I love them all. Even the slightly wonky ones like Duchess potatoes that go up in a little spiral.

- Jo Brand

Love, Potatoes, Slightly, Backgrounds

There's lots of different feminist groups. It's not as straightforward as just looking like a plumber.

- Jo Brand

Like, Straightforward, Lots, Plumber

When you get to know someone, you find there's something nasty in their woodshed.

- Jo Brand

Find, Someone, Get, Nasty

I've seen a lot of women give up after they've had three or four bad gigs in a row. It's very difficult to learn not to take nasty heckles personally.

- Jo Brand

Give, Bad, Very, Nasty

It's very difficult to learn not to take nasty heckles personally.

- Jo Brand

Personally, Very, Take, Nasty

People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn't. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare.

- Jo Brand

Better Person, Will, Read, Showbiz

As the Tories know, the problem with setting yourself up as a shining example for others to follow is that when you get caught out, that proverbial substance really hits the fan.

- Jo Brand

Caught, Proverbial, Tories, Shining

I have two brothers and we basically spent our lives playing in the woods, falling in ponds, getting chased by wasps and riding donkeys that we shouldn't have been riding.

- Jo Brand

Falling, Been, Chased, Donkeys

I cannot abide anyone treating another human being like a piece of dirt, whatever the context.

- Jo Brand

Human Being, Like, Another, Treating

So, my style has hopefully changed over the years and it is more relaxed, and I do tend to smile and have more than one expression these days hopefully - which I didn't at the beginning.

- Jo Brand

Expression, Over, Which, Relaxed

Everything becomes magnified at night. Sounds travel in a different way, it's dark, and everything seems far more spooky.

- Jo Brand

Night, More, Different Way, Magnified

I swam at school a lot. Long-distance swimming in pools, and diving, then when we moved to Hastings when I was 13 I used to swim in the sea all the time; I loved it out of season and when it was rough.

- Jo Brand

Rough, Moved, Then, Pools

They say revenge is a dish best eaten cold, but for most people, by the time it's ready to eat, they just don't fancy it any more.

- Jo Brand

Revenge, Fancy, By The Time, Eaten

Suffice to say, many women find their first appearance on a comedy panel show to be their last. Second chances seem to be given less often to the female of the species.

- Jo Brand

Last, Second Chances, Given, First Appearance

My personal opinion is that you can't be racist towards white people. You can be prejudiced about them, but being prejudiced isn't an illegal act, whereas being racist can be.

- Jo Brand

Personal, About, Them, Prejudiced

With two small children, I haven't had a wash since 2001 so the chance to go shopping is way down the list. It is something I do intend to get.

- Jo Brand

Chance, Small, Wash, Intend

I've never, ever had people being aggressive to me in public or abusing me, and actually quite a lot of men do say to me, 'You're quite good' - though they can't bear to go, 'You're great.'

- Jo Brand

Go, Had, Though, Aggressive

Again, with two small children it's incredibly hard to commit yourself to anything because you're just getting interested in it and someone comes along and goes I want Thomas The Tank Engine on, and screams the place down until you put it on.

- Jo Brand

Small, Two, Commit, Engine

I think self-esteem is fluid. It's not a fixed state, and so some days are better than others.

- Jo Brand

Think, Self-Esteem, Some, Fixed

There are two types of people in this world: one who opens a packet of biscuits, has one and puts the rest back in the cupboard, and one who eats the whole packet in one go.

- Jo Brand

Rest, Biscuits, Types, Opens

I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.

- Jo Brand

Church, Ringing, Dad, Bell

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