So I rang up British Telecom, I said 'I want to report a nuisance caller', he said 'Not you again'.
- Frank Carson
Want, Again, Nuisance, British
People in Northern Ireland vote for their church, they don't vote with their heads; it is ridiculous.
- Frank Carson
Church, Ridiculous, Heads, Ireland
I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man.
- Frank Carson
Best, Very, Am, Accusing
Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?
- Frank Carson
Sale, Irishman, Sold, Engine
The thirties were troublesome in Belfast, and then of course there was no work for people, and it was terribly religiously divided.
- Frank Carson
Work, Were, No Work, Troublesome
Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish.
- Frank Carson
Irish, Most, About, Jokes
It's never occurred to me to worry about my health, or that I'll get old, or that people will stop laughing at me.
- Frank Carson
Worry, Will, Occurred, Laughing
What's the difference between my wife and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist.
- Frank Carson
Wife, Difference, Negotiate, Terrorist
America has only 100 Senators for 309 million people, but Stormont has 108 members for 1.7 million.
- Frank Carson
Only, Million, Members, Senators
I don't think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance.
- Frank Carson
Marriage, Think, Very, Attack
My wife said to me: 'If you won the lottery, would you still love me?' I said: 'Of course I would. I'd miss you, but I'd still love you.'
- Frank Carson
Love, Wife, Still, Miss
My idea for peace in the Middle East is to go back to the 1966 line, but to build even more houses for the Palestinians, who are a poor people.
- Frank Carson
Middle, Line, Idea, Poor People
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