Don Rickles Quotes

Powerful Don Rickles for Daily Growth

About Don Rickles

Don Rickles, born on May 8, 1926, in Queens, New York City, was an American comedian, actor, and singer who revolutionized the art of insult comedy, earning him the moniker "Mr. Warmth." His sarcastic wit, biting humor, and improvisational skills made him a prominent figure in American entertainment. Raised by Jewish parents Mary and Max Rickles, Don was influenced by Vaudeville performances he saw as a child, inspiring his early aspirations to become a comedian. After serving in the Navy during World War II, he began his comedy career in the late 1940s, initially working as a nightclub emcee and later performing stand-up at venues like New York's Copacabana and Hollywood's Ciro's. In the 1950s, Rickles developed his trademark style of "insult comedy" that was both controversial and wildly popular. His ability to mock celebrities with impunity, often with razor-sharp one-liners, led to numerous appearances on talk shows and variety programs such as "The Ed Sullivan Show," "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson," and "Saturday Night Live." Rickles's major works include his comedy albums, including "Hello, Dummy!" (1968) and "Don Rickles Talking Olden Goldie" (1970), which cemented his reputation as a master of insult humor. He also gained widespread recognition for his roles in films like "Kelly's Heroes" (1970) and "Casino" (1995). Throughout his 60-year career, Rickles received numerous accolades, including multiple Grammy Awards, the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, and a Kennedy Center Honor. He passed away on April 6, 2017, leaving behind a lasting legacy as one of the most influential comedians in American history.

Interpretations of Popular Quotes

"I don't have any secrets. If I had any secrets, the first person I would tell is my psychiatrist - and he doesn't remember."

This quote suggests that Don Rickles has a humorous perspective on his own life, implying transparency and openness, as he claims to share everything except what his psychiatrist may have forgotten. It also implies that even if there were secrets, they wouldn't be kept for long due to their forgetfulness. The quote serves to emphasize his honesty and the light-hearted nature of his personality.

"My wife and I were happy for twenty-five years. Then we met."

This quote by Don Rickles humorously highlights the complexities and paradoxes in human relationships. On one hand, the statement suggests that his marriage was once content and peaceful for a long period of time; on the other, it implies an unexpected change or tension when they encountered each other again, possibly suggesting renewed passion or disagreement, which can often be found in long-term relationships. In essence, it's a comedic expression of the unpredictable dynamics that can unfold within a marriage over time.

"You mother was a Neanderthal!"

This quote, attributed to Don Rickles, is an example of comedic insult comedy. The phrase "Your mother was a Neanderthal" is used as a humorous way to belittle someone by suggesting their mother belonged to an extinct species known for being crude and brutish, implying the person being addressed has less-than-desirable traits or characteristics inherited from their mother. However, it's important to note that such humor can be offensive and is not suitable in all contexts.

"I don't have a glass jaw, I have a jaw of fists."

This quote by Don Rickles suggests that he is not someone who is easily defeated or intimidated. Instead, he is ready to fight back, implying strength, resilience, and confidence in his ability to stand up for himself. The use of the phrase "jaw of fists" humorously indicates physical toughness as well as a quick wit, suggesting that Rickles' defense against adversity comes not only from his strength but also his words.

"Dinner was delicious. The food had me begging for more - your forgiveness."

The quote humorously implies that the food was so tasty it made the speaker want seconds, but they also felt guilty for wanting more, as if overindulging or being rude by asking for additional servings. It showcases Don Rickles' unique comedic style of self-deprecating sarcasm and clever wordplay.

Famous people are deceptive. Deep down, they're just regular people. Like Larry King. We've been friends for forty years. He's one of the few guys I know who's really famous. One minute he's talking to the president on his cell phone, and then the next minute he's saying to me, 'Do you think we ought to give the waiter another dollar?'

- Don Rickles

Down, Years, Been, Famous

An insult is mean or unkind. Milton Berle called me the Sultan of Insult, and I was called the King of Insult. But the guy that gave me the best title - and I use it to this day - was Johnny Carson. He called me Mr. Warmth.

- Don Rickles

King, Use, Mr, Warmth

I like to think I'm like the guy who goes to the office Christmas party Friday night, insults some people, but still has his job Monday morning.

- Don Rickles

Think, Some, Still, Monday Morning

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

- Don Rickles

Funny, Stevie Wonder, Picks, Stevie

Las Vegas is the boiling pot of entertainment.

- Don Rickles

Vegas, Pot, Las Vegas, Boiling

The thing I love about Vegas is that it's a melting pot. It's like working Ellis Island.

- Don Rickles

Love, Vegas, Melting Pot, Pot

Room service is great if you want to pay $500 for a club sandwich.

- Don Rickles

Service, Want, Club, Room Service

The highlight of my career was being at the inaugural gala of Ronald Reagan, and I owe that to Mr. Sinatra.

- Don Rickles

Career, Reagan, Mr, Highlight

The girls, like, in we'll say Hooters, have less clothing than the girls I worked with in those days. We thought it was wild when they just wore little bells and so forth. But today, in restaurants, some of the waitresses almost work in the nude, you know, to get business.

- Don Rickles

Thought, Some, Bells, Clothing

I don't walk into a dinner party and say, 'You're an idiot; give me my coat.'

- Don Rickles

Idiot, Give, Say, Dinner Party

When you first start out with something new, you're always a little uptight.

- Don Rickles

Start, New, Always, Uptight

Why should I retire? I'm like a fighter. The bell rings, and you come out and fight.

- Don Rickles

Why, Like, Come, Rings

Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap.

- Don Rickles

Like, Elizabeth, Taylor, Empire State

I cannot tell a joke. But I can do a situation, that it becomes a joke.

- Don Rickles

Situation, Tell, Cannot, Joke

My father was an insurance man and a small-time gambler. He was a good man, but he had an eye for the racehorses, and I saw how it used to bother my mother. I've never gambled a dime. Never, in all those years in Vegas.

- Don Rickles

Father, Insurance, Had, Dime

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

- Don Rickles

Black, Why, Yeah, Blacks

I shouldn't make fun of the blacks: President Obama is a personal friend of mine. He was over to the house yesterday, but the mop broke.

- Don Rickles

Over, Broke, Mine, Blacks

When I walk down the street in New York, I swear to God, the building constructor, the guy pounding cement and what not, will yell, 'Hey, you hockey puck!'

- Don Rickles

Hockey, New, Will, Cement

I used to work over a bar. That was - there was no stage. I stood over a tiny bar. Louis Prima, rest his soul, he worked there. I was the guy that filled in when he was off the stage.

- Don Rickles

Work, Rest, Over, Prima

Herb Solo at that time was the head of MGM. I said, 'I want to live like Clint Eastwood.' Did I know at that time Clint Eastwood, to him, Heaven was a truck, a dog, and a picnic basket for food or something?

- Don Rickles

Basket, Eastwood, Clint, MGM

The man I adored, and miss him terribly, was Johnny Carson.

- Don Rickles

Man, Johnny Carson, Terribly, Johnny

Johnny Carson was a big influence on me - all of those shows I did with him over the years, like, 100 of them, they made a bit of a name for me at the time, so that part of my life was very good.

- Don Rickles

My Life, Big, Very, Johnny

Johnny Carson was king of the kings, in my opinion.

- Don Rickles

King, In My Opinion, Johnny

I mean, in my - and I'm not trying to do spilled milk, but in those days it was a little - I think it was much tougher, because you got an image, and you were in a saloon. And it was tough to come out of a saloon and to get in films, and to maintain an image, you know.

- Don Rickles

I Think, Maintain, Got, Saloon

The average person pushes an elevator button 6 or 7 minutes before realizing it's not working. I did a study on this, you know.

- Don Rickles

Study, Average, Before, Realizing

I exaggerate all our selves, our beings. I make fun of everything: of our life and what we are. But I don't tell jokes, really. I just exaggerate life, and it comes out funny.

- Don Rickles

Life, Tell, Our, Selves

Struggling is hard because you never know what's at the end of the tunnel.

- Don Rickles

Never, Know, Struggling, End Of The Tunnel

I don't drink much anymore, but when I traveled with Frank Sinatra, God rest his soul, I used to drink like I could do it. He made it a test. In Vegas, the Rat Pack, which I was a little part of, drank all night and slept most of the day. Then, about 5 o'clock, we'd meet in the hotel steam room, lock the door, and steam our brains out.

- Don Rickles

Soul, Door, Frank, Drank

At 90, I'm still working a couple of dates a month. My mind is very sharp on the stage, so why not? This may sound corny, but I do it because people - young and old - still come to see me, and they're very enthusiastic about my work. They treat me like the Godfather.

- Don Rickles

Treat, Very, Couple, Sharp

You got to have a lot of courage. Secondly, whatever it is you're doing, you have to believe in it wholeheartedly. Thirdly, you have to be able to stand up in front of people and know that they'll laugh.

- Don Rickles

Believe, Doing, Got, Wholeheartedly

When I was a younger guy doing comedy, it was a big struggle. Promoters canceled me out of clubs left and right when I called somebody a dummy or a yo-yo. Then they realized I was different.

- Don Rickles

Doing, Big, Younger, Promoters

Frank Sinatra. Hey, Frank, I saw you in 'The Pride and Passion,' and I want to tell you the cannon was wonderful!

- Don Rickles

Want, Tell, Frank, None

The inaugural of Ronald Reagan, with Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin. And that was the greatest thing. Ronald Reagan and George Bush. That was - I still remember like it was yesterday.

- Don Rickles

Frank, Still, Dean, None

I couldn't sell air conditioners on a 98-degree day. When I demonstrated them in a showroom, I pushed the wrong button and blew the circuit.

- Don Rickles

Sell, Circuit, Them, Blew

I have a wonderful road manager, and he travels with me. And my valet and friend travels with me. My little entourage is great, and they take good care of me.

- Don Rickles

Great, Manager, Wonderful, Entourage

Girls were scared of me because I can be loud. Barbara, my wife of 51 years, is very low-key. She was my picture agent's secretary.

- Don Rickles

Loud, Very, Agent, Low-Key

I busted my bird for 60 years in the business, but my grandkids only know me as Mr. Potato Head.

- Don Rickles

Business, Mr, Grandkids, Busted

If I have learned anything, it is to keep my wife happy by sending her lavish gifts. Other men can learn from my success and send their wives and girlfriends fresh flowers for birthdays, anniversaries, and of course, Valentine's Day.

- Don Rickles

Happy, Anything, Other, Valentine

I enjoy mixed audiences, not one particular group. Short, tall, scientists, Jews, gentiles, whatever, as long as they breathe and like to laugh.

- Don Rickles

Jews, Like, Gentiles, Laugh

You know how a fighter always comes into the dressing room way before a fight? That's me - I'm like a fighter.

- Don Rickles

Always, Like, Before, Dressing Room

Asians are nice people, but they burn a lot of shirts.

- Don Rickles

Burn, Asians, Lot, Nice People

We were Orthodox Jews, but we really didn't deserve it. I mean, bacon - my father said, 'Don't put bacon in the house,' but we had bacon. We didn't keep kosher. And we observed which today would be Conservative Jews. But in those days, we belonged to an Orthodox temple. So we made out we were Orthodox Jews, but we really weren't.

- Don Rickles

Father, Conservative, Had, Observed

My mother was a big influence. She kept pushing me because I was very shy and inhibited. And schoolwork was very difficult for me because I couldn't concentrate. I was failing almost every subject. To this day, I'm not too good at reading a book. But I was the president of my high school comedy group, and they treated me like a king.

- Don Rickles

Shy, Big, Very, Big Influence

I didn't get married until I was 38.

- Don Rickles

Get, Married, Until, Get Married

I did a picture 40 years ago with Carroll O'Connor and Telly Savalas, God rest their souls, and Clint Eastwood, called 'Kelly's Heroes,' which we filmed in Yugoslavia for six months.

- Don Rickles

Eastwood, Clint, Kelly, Telly

There's a difference between an actual insult and a friendly jab. So I don't think I'm offensive onstage.

- Don Rickles

Think, Offensive, Actual, Jab

Alan King, a comedian I adored, was considered society, and I was considered the Jewish kid from the neighborhood.

- Don Rickles

Society, King, Comedian, Alan

Nobody ever dared with Frank, because he had such mood swings, and you never knew how he was going to react. But I could tell the minute I saw him that he was going to be in my corner.

- Don Rickles

Mood, Tell, Frank, Dared

Bob Hope was totally regimented. I go in and say a line like, 'Hi Bob' and I'd have to do it five times, and then Bob would take me to the writers to say the line different ways. He wouldn't let me ad-lib.

- Don Rickles

Line, Like, Hi, None

Whatever you do to gain success, you have to hang in there and hope good things happen. Always think positive.

- Don Rickles

Think, Happen, Always, Hang In There

After over 50 years of headlining, I've been received very beautifully. But I always say, when you're onstage, you can't please everybody. I'm sure there are people who may not take to what I do, but that's OK.

- Don Rickles

Been, Everybody, Very, OK

I was sitting in the toilet and I was by myself. I was tired of playing with the roller, so I said I'd better write a book.

- Don Rickles

Book, Myself, Tired, Roller

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

- Don Rickles

Will, Next, Always, Sitting

They always use the word 'insult' with me, but I don't hurt anybody. I wouldn't be sitting here if I did. I make fun of everybody and exaggerate all our insecurities.

- Don Rickles

Here, Always, Everybody, Sitting

Being in the Navy, when I came home, it changed your whole life. You're 18, you go away for two and a half years, you come home - boy, you're a different person.

- Don Rickles

Navy, Away, Half, Changed

I have my own gym. When you do jokes and they sell, you get a gym.

- Don Rickles

Own, My Own, Sell, Jokes

I told jokes badly.

- Don Rickles

Badly, Jokes

I was always the guy who made jokes and ribbed people at parties. After I went to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts I got sidetracked into clubs and started doing comedy.

- Don Rickles

Doing, Always, Made, Jokes

Many, many years ago, I stood on the stage and told bad jokes and did Sophie Tucker as an impersonation, and nobody looked up; and suddenly, I looked down and said, 'Sir, I'm getting fed up with you. Either you watch, or I'm going to suck your neck,' or words to that effect, and suddenly people started to laugh.

- Don Rickles

Bad, Fed, Tucker, Jokes

To this day, if you gave me $1,000, I really can't stand up - You can tell a joke. You're a good storyteller and a good joke teller.

- Don Rickles

Good, Tell, Storyteller, Teller

Most people think the character I do onstage is the way I am offstage, but I'm just a regular guy who spends time with his family and who turns on the television and watches a lot of sports.

- Don Rickles

Guy, Turns, Lot, Regular

To me, the stand up part in my life is great. I know I can do that. When I get an acting chance, I'm really thrilled.

- Don Rickles

Chance, My Life, Part, Thrilled

Even when I was in high school and the Navy, I was the guy who could rip somebody, and they'd laugh at it.

- Don Rickles

Navy, Guy, Could, Laugh

The young comedians always ask me, 'What's the secret for staying around?' I tell them, 'There is no secret - just stay around. Longevity is the most important thing.'

- Don Rickles

The Most Important, Always, No Secret

I can get an audience screaming in Las Vegas and say, 'Barbara, that was a great show,' and she'll say, 'Would you please hurry up? We have dinner reservations at 9:30.'

- Don Rickles

Vegas, Audience, Las Vegas, Screaming

Smartphones. Who cares? Smartphones. I only have dummy phones.

- Don Rickles

Only, Phones, Cares, Dummy

I was a big shot in high school - big into social events and at the dramatic society - and I always had trouble in school. Not because I was a dummy, but I was always busy being the Jackson Heights clown.

- Don Rickles

Big, Always, Social, Dummy

After I graduated, I tried Broadway, which was difficult for me. It was tough to get a part on Broadway, so I just started talking to audiences at different social gatherings, and little by little I became Don Rickles - whatever that is.

- Don Rickles

Broadway, Part, Became, Gatherings

I have no idea what I'm going to say when I stand up to give a toast. But I do know that anything I say I find funny.

- Don Rickles

Give, Idea, Going, Toast

I was nice to the people in the Philippines for the two and a half years I was there, because I knew eventually I'd have to kiss up to them so my grandchildren could have toys.

- Don Rickles

Grandchildren, Toys, Half, Philippines

I spent two and a half years in the Philippines in World War II.

- Don Rickles

World, World War II, Half, Philippines

Compared to what comics say today, I'm a monk, but in those days, it was unheard of to make fun of people like I did. Of course, they exaggerated how outrageous I really was.

- Don Rickles

Say, Like, Comics, Outrageous

I did a few movies, but the word 'star'... I cannot compare to a star like Clint Eastwood. I used to call Clint 'Larry Dickman' when he would come to my show; then, he started using the name when he would go under cover in a 'Dirty Harry' movie. That's why he's a movie star... he's so creative.

- Don Rickles

Compare, Eastwood, Clint, Larry

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while, I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

- Don Rickles

Game, Play, Always, Stink

Every night when I go out on stage, there's always one nagging fear in the back of my mind. I'm always afraid that somewhere out there, there is one person in the audience that I'm not going to offend!

- Don Rickles

Mind, Audience, Always, Offend

I'd like to think my performance is today. I never try to - it's so, as you know, watching me, I have a beginning, middle and ending. But every night the show changes and I relate to an audience and I relate to the young people.

- Don Rickles

Beginning, Young, Show, Every Night

You lose your energy, you lose that excitement and it gets the audience up.

- Don Rickles

Lose, Audience, Your, Excitement

In our day we went from - we went into saloons. We couldn't cross over like you can today, get a television series and all of a sudden you're a major movie star, you know.

- Don Rickles

Star, Movie, Over, Movie Star

I'm very shy so I became very outgoing to protect my shyness.

- Don Rickles

Outgoing, Very, Became, Protect

Somehow, in my head, I don't think I'll die. I know that everybody dies, of course. I just think that it'll never come to me. It's crazy, but there it is.

- Don Rickles

Die, Think, Everybody, Dies

I've got an accountant who's been with me forty years. If he makes a mistake, he dies.

- Don Rickles

Mistake, Accountant, Been, Dies

Sometimes, I knew generally what I was going to do, but I've never written anything down. Call it a sixth sense: the lines just come.

- Don Rickles

Going, Knew, Sixth Sense, Lines

Once in a while, when I'm alone, I think about my age. I think, 'How many more years do I have on this earth?' But I can't really conceive of dying.

- Don Rickles

Think, More, I Think, Conceive

In the 45 years I've worked in casinos, I dreamed of being honored by an organization like the American Gaming Association, especially since I don't even have a hunting license.

- Don Rickles

Gaming, Association, Like, License

I was 28 when my father died, and I was an only child.

- Don Rickles

Father, Only, Died, Only Child

Don't call me 'sir; 'King Jew' will do fine.

- Don Rickles

King, Will, Call, Sir

I've been hot, I've been lukewarm, I've been freezing, but I've always been a headliner.

- Don Rickles

Hot, Always, Been, Freezing

Honestly, I didn't realize it - all of a sudden, I was 90. The years skipped by quickly. When it happened, I said, 'Where did the time go?'

- Don Rickles

Go, Quickly, Honestly, Realize

I'm a New Yorker, originally. I was raised in Jackson Heights. I went to P.S. 148 and then Newtown High School. If World War II didn't come, I'd still be there in school. World War II saved me.

- Don Rickles

Saved, World War, New Yorker, World War II

I was in World War II; I cried when they took me in the Navy. That's the last time I cried.

- Don Rickles

Navy, Last, Took, World War II

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

- Don Rickles

Mind, Ring, Back, Pocket

So, I'm on the satellite every Sunday, no matter where we are, with the Rams. Turn on the satellite; got to watch the Rams.

- Don Rickles

Turn, Matter, Every Sunday, Satellite

I do situations and make fun of authority and life.

- Don Rickles

Fun, Authority, Make, Situations

Compared to what some of the young comics use for material today, I'm a priest.

- Don Rickles

Young, Some, Material, Compared

I say things I get away with, and it becomes a joke.

- Don Rickles

Away, Get, Things, Joke

Half the battle is that people have to like you before you say one joke, one bit of humor.

- Don Rickles

Humor, Battle, Half, Joke

If something strikes me as funny, I'll put it in my performance.

- Don Rickles

Performance, Me, Something, Strikes

What keeps me going is that young people still want to see me.

- Don Rickles

Young People, See, Still, Keeps

An 'insult comic' is the title I was given. What I do is exaggeration. I make fun of people, at life, of myself and my surroundings.

- Don Rickles

Myself, Title, Given, Fun

If I were to insult people and mean it, that wouldn't be funny.

- Don Rickles

People, Mean, Were, Insult

Sinatra had a lot of mood swings, but he was wonderful to my wife Barbara and to me. He made no bones about who he liked and who he loved, and he had this great charisma. When he walked into a room, it stopped. I've only seen that happen with Ronald Reagan.

- Don Rickles

Mood, About, Reagan, Swings

You throw your best punch, otherwise don't do it.

- Don Rickles

Best, Throw, Otherwise, Punch

Bob Newhart, who is my best friend, is one of the guys I adore.

- Don Rickles

Friend, Guys, Adore, Bob

Diana Krall I met in, I think it was Canada. She's a lovely lady. Her husband, Elvis Costello, is a great star.

- Don Rickles

Think, Lovely, Costello, Met

It takes many years to be a great comedian.

- Don Rickles

Great, Takes, Many, Comedian

One thing a comedian does, when you step on the stage, you're selling yourself, and certainly I don't think the whole world can love you. But if you can get the majority on your side, you're really in business.

- Don Rickles

Love, Your, Whole, Comedian

I'm not one of those guys who wants to die on a stage.

- Don Rickles

Die, Stage, Wants, Guys

I've been to Philadelphia a lot of times over the years, playing the old Celebrity Room and most of the other clubs around there that don't exist anymore.

- Don Rickles

Celebrity, Over, Been, Philadelphia

Some people call me a legend and the last of the greats, and I appreciate it.

- Don Rickles

Some, Call, Last, Some People

Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.

- Don Rickles

Some, Funny Things, Things, Some People

It's very sweet to have people say nice things about you, and I always accept that.

- Don Rickles

Always, Very, About, Nice Things

To this day, when I say that I went to the American Academy, people are very impressed. The reputation of the school has always been fantastic.

- Don Rickles

Always, Been, Very, Fantastic

I don't have regrets. I've never sat here and thought, 'Gee, if only I'd done 'The Man Who Came to Dinner' on Broadway, I would have been happier.'

- Don Rickles

Thought, Here, Been, Dinner

I stopped smoking. But my personality I still have. I get up in the morning, and not everybody loves me, so if you want to call that a bad habit, there's that.

- Don Rickles

Everybody, Still, Stopped, Bad Habit

When I got out of high school, I wanted to be an actor but was getting a lot of rejections. I was getting rejected by life. My mother, God rest her soul, told me not to quit.

- Don Rickles

Soul, Rest, Rejected, Rejections

I don't care if the average guy on the street really knows what I'm like, as long as he knows I'm not really a mean, vicious guy. My friends and family know what I'm really like. That's what's important.

- Don Rickles

Average, Like, Vicious, Care

Ninety percent of the people who come to see me are my fans.

- Don Rickles

Me, See, Ninety, Ninety Percent

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

- Don Rickles

Opera, Over, Italians, Fantastic

My wife, Barbara, is great. She arranges when I do work that I have a day off between performances.

- Don Rickles

Work, Great, Wife, Barbara

My life was in Montreal years ago. Best food in the world.

- Don Rickles

My Life, World, Montreal, Years Ago

Everything I've performed has been from my own head.

- Don Rickles

Head, My Own, Been, Performed

I've never had a written script.

- Don Rickles

Never, Had, Written, Script

It's tough having the last name 'Rickles.' Luckily, my kids handled it great.

- Don Rickles

Last, Having, Handled, Luckily

I don't say I was the first, because, who knows, maybe there was a guy out in Minnesota doing it before me.

- Don Rickles

Doing, Maybe, Before, Knows

Among my friends, I'm not a little Boy Scout, and they love my humor, thank God.

- Don Rickles

Love, Boy, Boy Scout, Scout

I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.

- Don Rickles

Always, Making, Even, Insecurities

When you do comedy, you can't please the world, although I'd like to think that most of my audiences were on my side.

- Don Rickles

Think, Like, Side, Audiences

I've never gone to comedy clubs.

- Don Rickles

Comedy, Never, Clubs, Gone

I don't practice or write stuff down - everything I do onstage was just made up before I went on.

- Don Rickles

Practice, Made, Before, Onstage

When I'm onstage, I'm acting.

- Don Rickles

Acting, Onstage

I always say, when you're onstage you can't please everybody. I'm sure there are people who may not take to what I do, but that's okay. Thank God the majority are in my corner.

- Don Rickles

Always, Okay, Everybody, Onstage

I ride a recumbent bike for half an hour every day.

- Don Rickles

Every Day, Hour, Half, Bike

I have a problem, if the light goes on on TV and it blinks midnight, I don't know how to fix it.

- Don Rickles

How, Midnight, TV, Fix

Everything I've ever done in my whole career, people might not know, I've never written anything down on paper.

- Don Rickles

Career, Might, Whole, Paper

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed.

- Don Rickles

Insurance, My Life, Sold, Nobody

My wife is great. She always goes to the bank to see if the check has cleared.

- Don Rickles

Bank, She, Always, Check

The old days were the old days. And they were great days. But now is now.

- Don Rickles

Old, Now, Were, Days

I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

- Don Rickles

Always, Maybe, Might, Hard Time

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

- Don Rickles

Think, I Think, Took, Couch

Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all that.

- Don Rickles

Politics, Political, About, Correctness

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

- Don Rickles

Alone, Everyone, Last, Please Everyone

I have to have energy because I have a lot of expenses. A couple of cars, couple of dogs and a big estate.

- Don Rickles

Big, Couple, Lot, Dogs

I don't do impressions.

- Don Rickles

Impressions

I still have drive, but everything is relative.

- Don Rickles

Drive, Everything, Still, Relative

My grandchildren just know me now as Mr. Potato Head.

- Don Rickles

Grandchildren, Head, Potato, Mr

To my knowledge, I was the first guy really to do what I do. And then later on different comedians started trying doing it.

- Don Rickles

Doing, Guy, Started, Comedians

I write my own tweets.

- Don Rickles

Own, My Own, I Write, Tweets

My whole act is off the top of my head.

- Don Rickles

Head, Act, Whole, Top

I want to be a dog, but I'm a pussycat.

- Don Rickles

Want, Dog

You've got to be able to sell yourself.

- Don Rickles

Yourself, Able, Got, Sell

I was a mother's boy.

- Don Rickles

Mother, Boy

You can't study comedy; it's within you. It's a personality. My humor is an attitude.

- Don Rickles

Humor, Personality, Study, Comedy

My mother was a Jewish General Patton.

- Don Rickles

Mother, General, Patton, Jewish

Now when I'm not working, I don't really hang out with the young comics.

- Don Rickles

Young, Now, Hang, Comics

I don't like to compare myself with anybody.

- Don Rickles

Myself, Like, Anybody, Compare

My wife came into my life, and my mother still wanted to be the boss.

- Don Rickles

Mother, My Life, Still, Wife

Sinatra was somebody special.

- Don Rickles

Somebody, Sinatra, Special

I never went out looking for glory.

- Don Rickles

Looking, Never, Out, Glory

You know what's funny to me? Attitude.

- Don Rickles

Attitude, Me, Know, Funny

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