Dave Attell Quotes

Powerful Dave Attell for Daily Growth

About Dave Attell

Dave Attell, a renowned stand-up comedian and actor, was born on January 18, 1965, in Queens, New York City. Growing up, he developed a fascination with comedy, greatly influenced by legends like Richard Pryor, George Carlin, and Andy Kaufman. Attell's professional career began in the early 1990s, where he started performing stand-up comedy in clubs around New York City. His big break came when he was cast on Comedy Central's 'The Dave Chappelle Show,' where he played the character "Racist Comic," a role that solidified his reputation as a bold and unapologetic comedian. In 2001, Attell launched his own show, 'Insomniac with Dave Attell,' which ran for six seasons and was praised for its unique blend of stand-up comedy and late-night exploration of America's cities while the sun was up. Some of his most notable works include the specials 'Stymied' (2001), 'Road Trip with Dave Attell' (2006), and 'Mayhem & Chaos: Stand Up, Brooklyn' (2018). Attell has also made appearances on numerous other shows like 'Inside Amy Schumer,' 'Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn,' and 'Late Night with David Letterman.' Known for his dark humor, offbeat observations, and improvisational style, Attell continues to captivate audiences with his raw and unfiltered comedy. His unique perspective on life, combined with his keen wit and quick-thinking, has solidified his position as a pioneer in the world of stand-up comedy.

Interpretations of Popular Quotes

"I'm like a baby - I just do whatever I feel like."

This quote suggests a playful and spontaneous nature where an individual, much like an infant, acts upon their immediate feelings without hesitation or concern for societal expectations or conventions. It implies a lack of constraint, freedom, and a strong sense of self-expression, which can be seen as either liberating or reckless depending on the context in which it is applied.


"You know what's always lying? A mattress, that's always lying."

Dave Attell's quote humorously points out that a mattress is an inanimate object that is designed to be horizontal (lying flat) when used for its intended purpose. This highlights the common perception that when something is "always lying," it means it stays in one place or position, as opposed to moving around. In a broader context, the quote can serve as a metaphor for situations or people who consistently remain stagnant or unmoving in life.


"The more you look at other people, the more they start to look like sandwiches."

This quote implies that as we observe others, we tend to reduce their complexity and individuality down to simple, recognizable parts or elements, similar to how a sandwich is made up of distinct components (bread, meat, cheese, etc.). It suggests a tendency to oversimplify or categorize people based on our own preconceived notions or expectations.


"I'm not into drugs. I've never even smoked a joint. And let me tell you something about pot smokers – they're no fun!"

Dave Attell suggests that he does not partake in drug use, specifically cannabis (marijuana or 'pot'), and his comment implies that people who smoke marijuana are generally less enjoyable to be around. This statement might reflect a personal preference or an opinion about the effects of pot on social interactions.


"It's always good to be the guy who laughs at the funeral, until you realize it's your own."

This quote by Dave Attell highlights the delicate balance between humor and sensitivity in life. The act of laughing at a funeral symbolizes finding levity even in difficult situations, which can serve as a coping mechanism or a sign of resilience. However, as the quote suggests, it becomes less amusing when one realizes that the same situation now applies to oneself, underscoring the sobering reality and fragility of life. It's a poignant reminder that while laughter can help us get through tough times, we should never forget the gravity of our circumstances or lose sight of our own mortality.


When I was a kid, I really loved Indians. Native Americans. Pardon. Me.

- Dave Attell

Loved, Kid, Native, Native Americans

A lot of these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are to actually go out. They just really want to get a picture to post to their buddies, and that's about it.

- Dave Attell

Content, I Think, About, Buddies

I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes. I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.

- Dave Attell

Other, Like, Works, Jokes

I keep getting these people at my shows who only know me from television. I can always tell when they're, like, emotionally flinching when I start doing my jokes.

- Dave Attell

Doing, Always, Like, Jokes

I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.

- Dave Attell

Other, Like, Works, Jokes

I have soundtracks for a lot of stuff.

- Dave Attell

Stuff, Lot, Soundtracks

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

- Dave Attell

Diet, Chicken, Tell, Combine

I don't mind a crowd's not laughing; it's the groans that slow down the show.

- Dave Attell

Mind, Slow, Crowd, Laughing

You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.

- Dave Attell

Men And Women, Like, Exactly, Women Are

I'm a stand-up comic. Anything else I do besides that is a plus, but stand-up comedy is what I do, it's what I've been doing and it's what I'm going to keep doing.

- Dave Attell

Doing, Been, Stand-Up Comedy, Besides

For a long time the people at my shows were sort of the Pantera-tattoo trucker guys, really cool dudes, but I don't know what happened to them. That's the crowd that I like, the ones that don't get so offended just to be offended.

- Dave Attell

Long, Offended, Crowd, Dudes

My day jobs... I knew I was bad at those, so I didn't really have the confidence to think that I could do comedy. But I knew I hated the day jobs.

- Dave Attell

Think, Bad, Could, Hated

Sometimes it's hard to tell if a joke is working or not for the first couple of minutes.

- Dave Attell

Sometimes, Minutes, Couple, Joke

I'm not a movie guy, I'm not a TV sitcom guy, but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me.

- Dave Attell

Movie, Fit, TV, Sitcom

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

- Dave Attell

Some, Against, Cops, Some People

I have an imagination because my life is so boring that my imagination lets me get off the reality of what's going on.

- Dave Attell

Imagination, My Life, Going, Lets

I feel like soundtrack music is almost like seeing the movie again, but with my ears.

- Dave Attell

Movie, Like, Soundtrack, Ears

I have no grand scheme.

- Dave Attell

Scheme, Grand

I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous.

- Dave Attell

Famous, Get, Really, Recognized

Being on the road is kind of lonely.

- Dave Attell

Road, Kind, Being, Lonely

I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.

- Dave Attell

Love, Doing, TV, Stand-Up

Once you get offstage you're just like everyone else, and everyone else can get into a fight.

- Dave Attell

Everyone, Like, Once, Everyone Else

I'm not like a performer type.

- Dave Attell

Like, Type, Performer

I don't watch reality TV. I'm cool.

- Dave Attell

Cool, Watch, TV, Reality TV

I don't watch reality TV.

- Dave Attell

Reality, Watch, TV, Reality TV

I don't think I'm a star or a celebrity or any thing like that.

- Dave Attell

Think, Star, Like, Celebrity

If you're searching for quotes on a different topic, feel free to browse our Topics page or explore a diverse collection of quotes from various Authors to find inspiration.